Ramblings of a Mami of Two

Full disclosure: I generated the post's title using ChatGPT.  It's Mother's Day today.  I didn't plan on writing a blog post today. It is 2024. Social media has been reigning the past few decades and lengthy blog posts have gone out of style. Even Instagram has taken the backseat to TikTok. For personal and mental health reasons, I have chosen to leave Instagram temporarily, and, for the life of me, will never, ever, embrace TikTok.  I choose to remain a dinosaur in the social media age. Moving on.  I have been a mother for close to 16 years now. Being a mother is hard, y'all, and no one can ever say they are prepared to be mothers. If anyone tells you this, they are lying. No amount of reading can and will prepare you for the dizzying, emotionally intense, identity-changing whirlwind that is motherhood.  Having said that,  I wouldn't trade the past 16 years for anything in the world.  The love I have for my sonshines is unlike anything I have ever exp...

That’s it. That’s the title.  Today is our last Sunday, before he heads off into a new phase. 

Hello Hakimi.  Happy 15th Birthday. 

Happy 14 th Birthday, dear firstborn.  I am proud of the person you have become today. You have grown into a responsible young man who knows who you are and what you want to be. Life will throw you many curveballs, some of which will throw you off balance and sometimes into the pit. You will meet all sorts of people – nice, kind ones, nasty ones, and sometimes outright horrible, terrible, manipulative ones.  As long as you know who you are, and what your values are, you will always summon the courage to get back up, and know when and where to draw the line. Live an intentional life, as life is too precious to be wasted without intention.  You want to be able to look back and say to yourself, "I have lived a full life". Always put yourself first, but always be kind about it. Always speak your mind, but learn how to be strategic about it.  Kimi, A lot of my firsts were and will be with you. Along the way, I have learnt a lot but I have also made many, many, horr...

Asalamualaikum Hakimi anak pertama Mami,  You are 13 today.  You are on a life-long journey of discovery. There are so many wonderful things to learn about life, about yourself, about the world. How does the world work? Why do things around us happen? What motivates people to do the things they do? Why are we in living in a different country? Why is Mami baking too much bread? Why is your brother annoying you? How did Trump became the POTUS? How did a political party voted off legitimately became part of the ruling government two years later? ( eh? )   What are your values? What piques your curiosity? What makes you tick? What makes you happy? Do you even know how happy feels? Most importantly, who is Hakimi?  Tony Stark defines himself as a genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist .  What defines you?  Kimi baby,  I am already nearing 40, and even I don't have the answers to the above questions. Anyways, life is an evolving process - you cont...

My dear son, Kimi. You are going to be twelve this coming October 2020. Twelve, my son. It seems like yesterday that I had just given birth to you, sent you off to your pre-school, and stalked you on your first day of primary school. I haven't written much for you, in fact for anyone because blogs have gone out of style I guess. But somehow this week I wanted to write something for you. As I am writing this, we are apart from each other, you in Johor with your grandparents and adik, ayah in KL while I am far away in Indonesia. Last night you called me, and it struck me that, you have grown so, so much. Your voice has changed. Thankfully your voice changed when we were in KL together observing MCO so I wasn't that surprised but somehow when you called me last night, it struck me that you are now a pre-teen that I might not have much time with you anymore. Very soon, you will have your group of friends, your interests that I no longer understand, and we will grow apart ...