Mentally Unprepared

Honestly, I wasnt prepared for what was coming. But then, who was? Tade sape deyy... nobody knows how it feels to be pregnant before they got pregnant the first time. So how to prepare if you dont exactly know what is it youre preparing for? Like, how to defend yourself when you dont know what battle you're in?

While I was talking to a couple of new friends last week, (who both happen to be mother of 1 child), mereke dengan sedaya upaya nyer bercerite labor experiences kat aku. All under the rationale that I need to be prepared. Mentally that is. Hahaha dalam hati aku bekate, "Hotak ko le prepared." They expect me to not squirm at the descriptions of epidural nye jarum pierced into the spine, the neverending hours waiting for your vagina to dilate to 10, the sound of the doctor snipping you down south (*snip snip snip*) and yada yada i tuned out after 15 mins.

Pastu, derang cerita, dulu asyik fikir sakit jer... langsung tak prepare for the new lifestyle. The one when you have sleepless nights tidurkan baby yang takmau tidur (mintak2lee baby ni ikut perangai kuat tidur aku), and then how they felt so geram with the budak sebab theyre tired and the baby needed to be breastfed every 2 hrs... these are stories of other ppl, i know the situation varies from one person to another but still... that had me thinking.

I am not the most patient person i have ever met, in fact, i dont think there exist even a thread of patience in me (okay ini aku exaggerate, but i can safely say its close to 0). Dahla aku suke tido. Usually, I'd lose that little amount of patient I have if i dont get enough sleep. So, kalau baby itu tamau tidur.... put two and two together you get 4. Saya akan jadi mummy yang garang mungkin??

I do hope that I will change when the baby's out. Maybe I'll be the best mummy eveerrrrrrrr...Who knows?(tho do not expect me to make bentos every morning). Most ppl adapt kann?

Tehehehehe scary. Will I be a good mother? The concept of being a good wife is still kinda alien to me, ape lagi lahh menjadi seorang mother. Dude, life is full of unexpected surprises isnt it?